Canon
by jellyheart84
Summary: When producers Adam and Eddie begin writing a TV series called OUAT, they model two of their characters after writers working on the show: Emily Sworn and Ramona Mayor. The passionate relationship between these women will inspire the show's greatest moments...but will their vision for their characters be allowed to become canon? Swan Queen meta-fic.
1. Chapter 1

Adam and Eddie greeted Emily Sworn when she came in the door with a cup of coffee and their firmest handshakes. Emily wasn't a "hugger" and she almost intimidated the two men in her worn motorcycle jacket. Her helmet she sat wearily on one of the chairs at the small table in the small trendy coffee shop in the shadow of ABC development studios, whipping her long blonde hair back from her face, and smiled gratefully when a waitress brought over a latte, glancing appreciatively at the waitress' hips before turning to them with her full attention.

"So we have a job we think you'd be perfect for." Eddie started. "We've got this fairy tale series, it's sort of the same idea as Lost- a group of people trapped in a fantasy environment, lots of puzzle elements, longform serialized drama."

"And our main character is essentially you. Our Emma Swan isn't a freelance writer, but it's a big part of her background as a character that she was also abandoned as a baby to the foster system, I hope that's alright if we incorporate that and we want her to sort of dress and act like you- -"

Emily sniffs. "I guess I'm flattered? I don't know. Depends on how you write her. "

"How _we_ write her." Adam hurriedly interjected.

"We'd love for you to come onboard, as we're sure your agent has told you. We want all the writers to meet each other at a retreat up in Big Bear next weekend. All expenses paid. We're going to try and break the season up there before we start assigning scripts." Eddie and Adam paused, expectantly, waiting for Emily to signal her agreement.

Emily kept them waiting another long moment before nodding. "Is this 'Emma Swan' also going to be gay like me?"

Adam shrugged. "Who knows. That's what breaking the season will help us determine."

Emily thought of her almost-empty bank account. Adam and Eddie were offering her what could possibly be a very lucrative job. And the idea of them writing a show around her as a character, well, that could get tricky but…she'd be lying if she said she wasn't touched. Adam and Eddie, college buddies from way back, were as close to family as she'd found since moving to LA.

"I'm in." Emily Sworn said.

* * *

The cabin was luxurious, a three story log-cabin mansion in the most exclusive gated community on the mountain. The eight writers who had been chosen were met at the door with hot toddies and a team of interns who happily took their luggage to their rooms. Adam and Eddie, flanking a huge whiteboard by the fireplace, welcomed everyone in the main hall and told them they were going to get started right away with establishing the premise.

Emily looked around the room, looking for someone she might know, but all the writers were new to her. Most were the standard shlubby-guy-wearing-converse variety of professional writer, but she noticed one other woman, already seated near the fireplace, in a perfectly tailored pantsuit. She had an ipad out that she was flipping through impatiently and a cocktail on the hearth. Her jaw-length black hair hid a heart shaped face with large, dark eyes. She sat like she had a ram rod for her spine, her posture perfect. Adam was introducing another writer to her, a handsome guy with cowboy boots and a bit of scruff on his jaw.

"Gray, I'd like you to meet Ramona Mayor…."

Emily took a seat, crossing her leather clad arms, her mud-spattered boots sprawled out in front of her. The other writers were taking their places. They went around the horn and each gave their names. Then Adam and Eddie stood before the whiteboard, markers in hand and started talking. Emily was listening attentively, and liked their description of Emily, thought it was interesting her parents were Snow and Prince Charming- although they'd have to work out how they hadn't aged in the intervening 28 years- and then noticed Ramona perking up when they started talking about the 'big bad', a villain named Regina.

"So Regina will be beautiful but very cold woman-" Adam's eyes flitted to Ramona as if in apology, the same way he'd looked at Emily when he described Emma as "a gruff, tom boy sort of woman."

"She antagonizes Henry in some way. We're thinking maybe his adoptive mom in town works for her. Maybe she even has tried to kill him in the past…"

"Or maybe Regina's the one that adopted him." Ramona's clear, strong voice filled the circle of writers. "Wouldn't it be interesting if the villain also loves the protagonist's kid? It gives them both a conflict and a shared goal."

Adam and Eddie looked appreciative, and the other writers murmured a little at the interjection.

"Okay, lets up that up on the board as a possibility." Eddie said, and wrote out "Regina: raised Emma's son?"

The idea touched off a flurry of brainstorming. So many connections were now being made with just this small adjustment to the character of Regina. She was an Evil Queen, yes, but with an Achilles heel, a boy she'd doted on for ten years. The heir to her worst enemies. Hours flew like minutes, and a catering truck arrived with platters of burritos and tacos for lunch, so the writers had to break off mid-flow.

"And after lunch, we're all headed to the lake for a team building exercise. " Adam announced as his assistants hurriedly passed out food. "So get those calories- you're going to need them!"

* * *

The handsome guy in the cowboy boots sought Emily out, giving her a big handshake once they'd all finished a catered lunch and headed to the lake that lay at the edge of the cabin's property. A small, chipper young woman with purple dyed hair and a nose ring also made a point of saying hello. Ramona seemed to keep her distance- not just from Emily, but from the entire group.

Perhaps that's why Emily was so fascinatedly staring at her as Adam and Eddie split them into two groups and assigned each group to different sailboats moored at the harbor. The lake was just a short walk from the cabin, and Eddie and Adam were like two summer camp counselors, buoyant about the team-building task at hand.

"Writing takes team work, and trust, and communication. So this sailboat race is going to put all those skills to the test!"

Emily saw Ramona make her way onto the boat she'd been assigned to, picking her tall, elegant black Laboutins through coils of rope and puddles on the white, chrome-spangled deck with a distasteful expression on her face.

"First time on a boat?" Grey called to her with a cheerful smile. Ramona nodded, fastening her life preserver.

"Not only that, I can't swim." Ramona replied, but gamely grabbed the rigging as she was instructed by their boat leader and started putting her small heft into lifting the sails.

Adam stood on the deck and fired a starter pistol, and the two sailboats erupted in a flurry of activity.

Emily had sailed a boat before, as a kid in Florida, so she was working perfectly in step with the captain hired to direct them from the afternoon. Their main sail caught a big bellow of air and Grey, steering, made the most of it. They made an almost flawless turn around the buoy that marked the half mile point, out in the middle of the lake.

That's when a gust of sail pushed a smaller sail Ramona was responsible for directin just out of her reach. Emily watched, horrorstruck, as the small woman put a knee on the chrome rail, putting all her balance on one specific point just as the ship turned- and fell straight into the choppy lake water below.

"Man overboard!" Emily cried, and jumped in with one fluid motion.

In the water, Ramona had sunk like a stone, then come back up, arms flailing. The wake of the boat was pulling her in a crazy arc, like a riptide, straight toward the side of the boat. Emily's leather jacket and motorcycle boots weighed down, exponentially heavier now they were waterlogged, but Emily called on every scrap of her strength to blaze through the water to grab her before she'd strike the turning boat.

Emily caught Ramona's lithe torso with one toned arm and started kicking toward a wooden platform moored close to the race course, pulling with all her might to escape the drag of the vessel. Once they got to the platform she held it steady and made sure Ramon had clamoured up to safety. Then, with the last of her strength, she pulled herself onto the platform, turning to face the beautiful dark haired woman trembling on her knees beside her. Both boats were making lazy turns back toward the platform. Emily could see a dingy approaching with a concerned Adam and Eddie inside. The air, on her wet skin, was much colder than when she'd been dry, and as she wrang out her leather jacket she fought the urge to hang it on Ramona's shoulders. No, the last thing the panting woman next to her needed was more water. Ramona was taking inventory of her spoiled tights and missing shoe with a look of extreme vexation.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked at last, watching the olive-skinned brunette next to her gasp for breath.

"Yes, but what the hell did you do that for?!" Ramona snapped, her eyes on fire. "You just cost us the race."

"What do you mean I cost us the race? Who cares? You were about to bang right into that boat."

"That was none of your concern, Ms. Sworn." Ramona snapped.

Eddie and Adam, watching, exchanged glances.


	2. Chapter 2

Adam volunteered to drive them back to the cabin in his own car, both of them wrapped in blankets, Ramona beside him in the front, Emily in the back, both of them trembling like tuning forks.

"I suppose there's no way to drag the lake for my shoe?" Ramona asked tersely. "I think Ms. Sworn managed to kick it off of me."

"You're _complaining_ about the way I _saved your life_?!" Emily gasped. Adam chuckled to himself.

"My life was hardly in peril." Ramona said dismissively. "I had on one of those orange vests."

"The boat was going to turn and plow right into you if you didn't swim out of its way, and you said you couldn't swim!"

Ramona was silent at last. "Well. Thank you then."

"If it makes you feel better, Ramona, you would have been disqualified from winning anyway because you fell off the sailboat. I'm pretty sure all hands have to be on deck for it to be considered a win."

"Thank you Adam, that makes me feel _much_ better." Ramona snapped, launching herself out of the car. Adam turned to Emily, who was sitting with her jaw hanging open watching the poised figure stomp toward the mansion.

"Ramona is…a very specific kind of person." Adam said apologetically, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"Yeah- a freaking btich."

"Hmmmm, no, its more like- Ramona hides her fear by getting angry, I think. I think she was terrified when she fell overboard but she didn't want to react in a weak way. Try not to take it personally. She's actually a really wonderful person. We sort of built the character Regina around her."

"Oh, I buy it. She's an evil queen alright."

* * *

"Pilot establishes Emma is Henry's mom, Regina has raised Henry, and Emma's mom Snow White is either a nun, a veterinarian, or…?" Adam extended his hands, appealing for ideas.

"A school teacher?" the girl with purple hair suggested.

"Right. Badly paid, super hard job, never gets enough respect!"

"Henry's schoolteacher." Grey suggested.

"I like that! Good connection!" Eddie said, writing it down on the whiteboard. "Let's put a pin in that for now. Back to the central Emma thruline: how do we keep her in Storybrooke? Why would she stay there to begin with, as opposed to just going back to Boston and commuting every weekend?"

"Bad things happen to people who try to leave, we've established that." Grey pointed out.

"But she needs to choose to stay. She has to make a heroic choice to be invested in her son's life. She's not a crazy maternal person, so after seeing her son is well cared for by a rich mayor, why would she need to stick around?"

"Because Regina's a bitch." Emily called without raising her hand. "She may seem like she's really well put together but she's emotionally damaged and Emma picks up on that right away."

Ramona seemed to sit bolt upright. The women hadn't talked to Emily since yesterday's boating incident. Ramona had gone to bed early after dinner without so much as a goodnight.

"I like that. BUT:How do we make it clear for the audience, in a really simple way?" Eddie asked Adam.

"We have established that Emma has this ability to tell when people are lying. Maybe she asks Regina if Regina loves Henry, she says yes and she can tell Regina doesn't really love him."

"But Regina does love him." Ramona interrupted. Her hands, crossed over the ipad on her lap, were in tight fists. "Of course she loves him. He's her happy ending."

"Regina doesn't even know what love is." Emily retorts.

"And Emma does?" Ramona shot back, glowering at her across the room.

"Emma IS love, guys, she's the embodiment of true love." Eddie tapped on the two platitudes heavily underlined on the white board: TRUE LOVE IS THE GREATEST MAGIC and ALL MAGIC COMES AT A PRICE.

Emily groaned dramatically. "Yeah, okay, those are the 'world rules' but...What does that even mean? She's got heart shaped chromosomes?"

"Its basically a get-out-of-jail free card for the Saviour to do a bunch of magical stuff with no other explanation. And for that to cause whatever conflict we need." Eddie laughed. The other writers laughed too.

"Look, we're pretty happy with the general outline we've put together here, we still have a lot more of the season to get through but as the pilot is going to need to be turned in to ABC execs for first review by end of business day tomorrow, time is of the essence. We're going to assign scenes to groups of two for dialoguing. Emily, Ramona- maybe you could handle the scenes between Regina and Emma, in act two and act four?"

Emily frowned.

"We really think you two could bring an interesting dynamic to it." Eddie said.

* * *

"I'm going to warn you now: I _don't_ collaborate well on dialogue, Ms Sworn." Ramona said crisply to Emily said as the group broke off in pairs for the rest of the day.

"Oh yeah? I'm shocked." Emma said, crossing her arms. "I guess you want us to each do a pass of this and then read the other's first draft?"

"Yes, actually." Ramona said primly. "It should only take me a few hours. Then I'll email you my version and vice versa?"

"Can't wait." Emily said gruffly, and picked an apple out of one of the fruit baskets on an end table, bit into it just as she passed by her, watching Ramona wince at the graphic crunching sound out of the corner of her eye as she walked off.

* * *

Ramona's draft came up a few hours later, as promised. Emily, who had been walking in the woods and scratching lines on a note pad, was still entering hers in final draft, and ignored Ramona's email until she was finished, not wanting to have her version tainted by reading Ramona's first, then sent her version off before she opened Ramona's attached pdf document:

SCENE: OUTSIDE REGINA'S HOUSE, LARGE EAST COAST MANSION _Emily Swan rushes at door, bangs against it while yelling angrily at house. Steps back, inserts front fingers in sides of mouth and emits shrieking whistle as Henry hangs awkwardly behind her, undeniably embarrassed. The door opens to reveal Regina Mills, a distinguished looking woman of indeterminable age._

REGINA: Can I help you? Why- Henry?! Oh thank God! (calling to GRAHAM who stands offscreen) Graham, we can call of the search, he's home!

EMILY: Yo, your boy looked me up in the big city. I'm his birth mom.

REGINA _stares at the beautiful blonde, confused. As she does, Emily belches into her sleeve._ Henry, thank God you're alright- _(she hugs the boy, who wilts in her arms with undeniable affection.)_

EMILY: I'm Emily Swan, his birth mother. Crazy right?! You owe me about 80 dollars for gas.

REGINA: Well thank God he takes after his father, I guess.

* * *

Across the hall, Ramona was eying Emily's version with similar distaste:

SCENE: _The front walk outside a Mayoral mansion. A dinner party is happening inside as Emma and Henry approach._

EMMA: Kid, are you sure this is the right house? Would your mom really throw a party if you were missing?

HENRY: That's what I'm trying to tell you. She's….she's inhuman.

_A door opens with a butler holding a tray of champagne flutes to welcome Emma._

BUTLER: Welcome to the Mills Campaign Fundraising party. And your name is…?

EMMA: Emma, Emma Swan.

_Regina appears behind him, in a low-cut evening gown. She's a breath-takingly beautiful woman who is certainly dressed flawlessly but her eyes are two cold, windy holes that reveal an abyss where a soul should be._

REGINA: Henry? What are you doing out here in the yard, in your school clothes? I thought you…and who is this?

EMMA: I'm his mom. His _real_ mom.

REGINA: _(Laughs airily)_ So you're the breeder? How hilarious. But what are you doing here?

* * *

Eddie and Adam called Ramona and Emma into a smaller room in the cabin the next morning.

"We got your drafts of the scene." Adam began. "Which, first of all, forgive us if we were unclear but we wanted _one_ set of scenes, written by _both_ of you...not two different drafts."

"We didn't see eye to eye on the characters." Ramona said tartly. "Perhaps you can give Emily a little more direction here."

"I'm worried both of you have some weird ideas about these characters. I mean, Ramona, your last scene between them ends in a fist fight. And Emily, you have Regina almost drown in a harbor and then kill both the fisherman who try to rescue her which is...well, its way off the outline we laid out as a group."

Emily shook her head, a soft laugh escaping her lips. "The crazy thing is I really thought Ramona's writing was very, very good. I liked what she did with keeping it simple and introducing Graham as the sheriff, that made sense. I wanted to keep almost all of it but she didn't like my pass on Regina's dialogue." "You don't get to do a pass of Regina's dialogue." Ramona said coldly. "I know this character inside and out and you come along and think you can put words in her mouth?"

Adam and Eddie's eyes flitted back to each other.

"The thing is, the dynamic they have really works." Eddie said softly. "One is trying to reach out and the other slaps her away."

"Why don't you try actually dialoguing these characters?" Adam suggested. "Role playing?"

Ramona and Emily looked at each other furtively.

"This isn't a suggestion. I'm telling, you, as a boss: Do what you have to do, lock yourselves in a room, but give us one set of strong scenes because we need to turn this in."


	3. Chapter 3

Ramona faced off across from Emily, one of the interns transcribing what they were saying, his fingers fluttering over a keyboard. Neither of them were actresses but they were trying to dialogue it out as per Adama and Eddie's instructions.

"You know what's kind of crazy? Yesterday was my birthday and when I blew out the candle on this cupcake I bought myself, I actually made a wish. That I didn't have to be alone on my birthday. And then, Henry showed up."

Ramona looked at her with steely eyes, as though analyzing her more than actually listening to her offered olive branch. "I hope there's no misunderstanding here…"

Emily raised an eyebrow, thrown, almost wondering if Ramona was breaking out of character. "I'm sorry?"

"Don't mistake all this as an invitation back into his life…"

Emily felt almost punched in the gut by the coldness of Ramona's turn, and the intern transcribing next to them made a small, appreciative whistle.

"Bitch is cold!" he laughed after their dialogue had trailed off, and Ramona shrugged.

"Its just what comes naturally." Ramona joked with a large, perfect smile outlined in crimson lipstick.

* * *

"ABC loves it." Adam's voice rang in Emily's ear, she had to plug her other ear and duck behind Neptune's Net, where she as having lunch after a long motorcycle ride up the PCH to hear him.

"That's awesome!"

"Usually they wait for upfronts to order the series but it turns out because of our work with Lost they just want us to go full steam ahead, straight to series! We're going to need you and Ramona back in the writing room immediately. We've also got to start casting next week, if you want to be in on that-"

Emily made a face on her end but chirped happily, "That's fantastic! A whole season order? How many episodes?!"

"21."

Emily sat down hard on a rickety bench behind the diner and put a hand over her mouth. It was incredible. Possibly the biggest job she'd ever been a part of. It could change her life. She was already a respected writer but usually was brought on for pilots and punch up. To be staff for a major network show…this was the game changer she'd been waiting for. Even if she had to sit across from Ramona every day.

* * *

As Emily walked towards the OUAT writer's office for the first day, she was stopped in her tracks by the make up tests pinned to the corkboard leaned up against the halls. She had seen headshots of Lana Parrilla when she was first cast as Regina and noticed a passing resemblance to Ramona, but now she was seeing a stunning replica of Ramona staring back at her from the wall. The black, sleek cropped hair, the red lips and devilish smile, the sleek gray gown. It was like Tina Fey's impersonation of Sarah Palin. It almost made her giggle in the hallway, until she caught sight of her own doppelganger.

Jen Morrison stood with her arms crossed in a red leather jacket, feet solidly planted in tall leather boots. Her hair was very, very curly (Emily never did anything with her own long pale blonde hair- which was a little shorter than Jen's). But she felt flattered to think this was her "celebrity stretch" and stared appreciatively.

"Spooky, isn't it?" came a purring voice behind her, and Emily turned to see Ramona, coffee cup in hand, a smart black suit on, her own immaculate face peering into Lana Parrilla's as though she was staring into a mirror.

"It is kind of weird. Although I'd never wear the kind of false eyelashes they've got Jen in."

"No point, they'd fly off once you fired up your 'hog', I'm sure. I will commend the costume department for perfectly capturing your penchant for pants that leave nothing to the imagination." Ramona flicked a pinky at the skin-tight jeans Jen Morrison had been styled in.

"You know, I never thought they'd make Emma this…well, I mean…I see these costume tests and I think hey, maybe we're actually going to have a gay main character on our show. Maybe we're going to make history. And I'll get to be a part of it." She ducked her head, suddenly feeling shy at saying something so sincere to Ramona of all people, who was staring at her intensely. Ramona's brow knitted.

"So you are writing with us for the season? Not just stopping by."

"Um…Yeah…." Emily said, putting a hand on her hip, slowly becoming defensive.

"And I assume this is your first primetime network series?" Ramona cocked her head, raised one manicured eyebrow.

"Yes." Emily started to feel embarrassed, but kept her head up. Ramona stifled a small smile.

"Well, as someone who has written on many different staffs, let me tell you, you can abandon that fantasy right now. There is not going to be a gay woman heading up a drama on a primetime Disney affiliate in either of our lifetimes. Believe me, I know: The networks, the execs just aren't capable of doing it."

"Yeah, well…" Emily refused to look away from her gaze. "You don't know what I'm capable of, Ramona." She said, and turned sharply onto her heel and into the writer's room, barely keeping her angry embarrassment in check.

* * *

They started filming after the first four scripts were written. They wanted to break the season but held off because the network wanted to see what "gets" they could manage as cameo stars and wanted to put them in context as fairy tale characters. Still, because of all the CGI the production schedule was moving at a clip, and Eddie and Adam confessed to their writers that while they were vaguely aware of how it was all going to resolve, they should get used to the idea of writing with a "partial road map."

The first table read was sandwiched in between two writing sessions, and Eddie and Adam called in Emily and Ramona to be there for the scenes they'd written for the first two episodes.

Emily came in and shook hands with Jen Morrison ,who was much more petite than Emily was expecting, barely clearly her chin, and Lana Parrilla, also exquisitely petite and surprisingly warm and friendly in person. Emily realized, with chagrin, she'd been waiting to snarl at her like she and Ramona did in the writer's room on a daily basis, their charged bickering silencing the other writers and frequently bringing meetings to a stand still until Adam and Eddie would demand they take their scene into the hall and work it out amongst themselves.

Adam was heading the table read today and introduced the four women, smiling broadly.

"I hear Emma is based on you." Jen smiled at Emily, who felt her cheeks blush slightly. "And of course its easy to see where Regina came from-" she gestured at Ramona, who was wearing a dress almost identical to the dress Regina wore in the premiere- sleek gray satin, in a very modern cut.

"Considering she's the villain of the series, that's not exactly a compliment." Ramona said bluntly, causing Jen to look a little startled and Lana to barely suppress a laugh.

"Emily, maybe you could tell me about how you met Ramona?" Adam said as they all sat around a large conference table.

Emily groaned. "Let's see. She fell into the ocean and then got really pissed when I jumped in and fished her out."

"I was 'pissed' , as you so adolescently describe me, because you cost us the boating race. And kicked off my shoe."

"She would have been at the bottom of the pond, and not having really talked to her I thought that was a bad idea."

Ramona's eyes flared and her lip pulled in a small sneer. "My laboutin is languishing there now, if you're feeling compulsively heroic anytime soon."

Adam's eyes flitted between Lana and Jen. "Do you get it?" he said to the two actresses.

"Oh, I get it." Jen said, widening her eyes at Lana, who nodded knowingly.

"Yeah, I'm getting a real sense of the character." Lana gave Jen a small wink.


	4. Chapter 4

The writers were ushered into a small screening room on the ABC Burbank lot for the in-house premiere of the pilot. It was basically a small movie theater, albeit with much more comfortable chairs and no popcorn for sale. Most of the writers brought dates. Emily noticed Ramona did not, though she dressed fantastically, casually chic in a Chanel jacket over black jeans and a lacy blouse. She sat separate a little from the rest of the writers.  
The purple haired writer Emily had noticed at the retreat, Sue Small, gestured to the chair next to Emily, pulling her attention away from the dark haired writer who had been approached by Lana for a quick consultation about the next day's filming.

"Do you mind if I sit there?" she asked, a huge smile under her tortoise-shell cat-eye glasses.

"Sure, it's available."

Sue sank gratefully into the chair, and gave her a big smile, pulling a bag of candy out of her large bohemian purse. "I know it's just a cast and crew screening but I'm so excited! I just have a really great feeling about this series."

"I know. You're doing fantastic work with Mary Margaret, by the way. I loved your proposal for her and David Nolan's sort of on-off affair."

"Thanks so much! I'm lucky I get to just squirrel away and handle so much of that. I don't know how you and Ramona work together so much. I've never been able to write with a partner."

Emily smiled. When they were assigned scenes, frequently she and Ramona would disappear to the studio lot starbucks or walk around the studio warehouses, bickering through the dialogue, arguing their character's side, and finally reaching a consensus for where things should go. From the outside, it probably looked like a partnership, but it felt more like a wrestling match.

The houselights went down before she could reply. Adam and Eddie said a few words of thanks, the actors calling out and applauding loudest, sitting all in one row, laughing with each other, sharing their set jokes.

"We also have an exciting announcement. When we go film episode 2, the entire crew will be coming back with us to Vancouver, so we can film and write together as one big Once Upon a Time family!"

Emily's eyebrows shot up. Seriously?!

"Try not to focus on that during the pilot." Adam interjected, to uneasy laughter. Emily's mind was already racing. Where would they live? Would they find them housing?

"Vancouver?" Emily said aloud.

"My boyfriend's going to be so pissed!" Sue whispered.

Emily darted a look over at Ramona. She looked angry at the news, as ever.

And then their pilot started.

Emily felt vaguely undressed when Emma and Regina faced off onscreen. IT was pretty clear who the two actresses were doing an impression of…and it was…sort of steamy. Was she crazy, or were the two women…the way Lana's eyes raked Jen up and down. Ramona had looked her up and down many times before but she'd never read it quite like that.

On the screen, it was undeniable. Jamie, who played Graham, even let out a wolf whistle. Emily felt her cheeks grow red. She stood up, painfully aware of how her unmistakable silouhette would be noticed by the rest of the writers, but needing to flee the room. She went out to the stairs that led up to the tiny screening room and lit a cigarette with shaking hands. She heard the door open behind her, and saw Ramona, her cheeks pink.

"Hello." She said stiffly. "Can I have a drag?"

Emily handed her the cigarette and she let a loose cloud of smoke escape her crimson lips, her eyes distant.

"It's going to be a hit, you know."

"I know.

"So why'd you run off during our scene."

"I just got..embarassed."

"It's weird how much chemistry Lana and Jen have." Ramona admitted. "Somehow the scene sort of…"

"Reads as a meet cute." Emily said, cutting off anything steamier Ramona might have said. The thought of Ramona's silky voice forming any word even close to "come on" made Emily's knees feel week, and that was just imagining it. Emily shook her long pale blonde hair out of her eyes, feeling grouchy at Adam and Eddie.

"Now we're moving to Vancouver?" she muttered, sinking heavily down on the stairs. "Why do they need us there? We could email them scripts."

"It's not like you've got anything better to do." Ramona scoffed, then added, "Apparently they want to spend part of the day on set and part of it in the writer's room. Frankly, I'm not excited about it either." Ramona said, sitting gingerly on the cement step. She reached out for the cigarette again, Emily let her have it and lit her own.

"Thanks. But for the record, I don't smoke." Ramona added apropos of nothing, taking another expert hit. Then, as though punctuating the sentence, she blew out a perfect smoke ring, and Emily couldn't help but laugh.

* * *

Emily's manager was a frail man who wore expensive sweaters and boating shoes. Since she'd netted a high paying job, she couldn't get him off the phone. All the concern after months of being ignored was a little stifling, but Emily tried to take it in , for example, he was furious about the Vancouver housing arrangements.

"They're actually asking that you consent to sharing a house with another writer to save on costs. This is a major network show! It was their call to bring writing staff up to Vancouver. I'm going to push back, so don't even worry about it-"

"What writer?" Emily asked, feeling suddenly curious.

"Someone they CLAIM is your writing partner. You're an independent staff writer, I told them, being payed a single-writer fee, so if they try pushing that angle-"

"Ramona?" Emily looked thoughtfully out the window of her small Venice apartment onto the sunny, bleached storefronts that ran the long boulevard all the way up to the beach.

"Ramona Mayor, yes…"

"I'm actually fine with that." Emily said. "Confidentially of course."

The manager sighed with relief. "Good, because they actually seemed pretty firm about it."

* * *

Emily got to the large, dilapidated Victorian first. It was one of four on a cul de sac rented for the writers and crew to share. She was exhausted after her long flight (several delays) and had curled up on the couch for a nap but kept hearing giggling in the vicinity of the porch of the rental. And then, the door started ringing, loud and insistent, the old fashioned shrill sort of bell that makes yoru stomach seized. In a blind rage Emily staggered over to the door, expecting a group of panksters, realizing too late as she pulled the door back that she'd neglected to pull a robe on over her wife beater and red lacy underwear.

"Welcome to set!" chorused Lana Parrilla and Jennifer Morrison, who were standing on either side of Ramona, who looked weary and was struggling to manage both a huge pile of suitcases and a big basket of fruit wrapped up in cellophane that the actresses had clearly just given her.

She scanned Emily up and down and her eyes bugged, the fruit basket dropping from her hands, Emily hurried to catch it.

"Oh- hi Regina- Ramona- Jen- Lana-" Emily scrunched her face, and then looked down. "I forgot my pants when I opened the door, didn't I."

Jen Morrison was choking with laughter. Lana doubled over.

"Yes, you really, really did." Ramona's eyes seemed riveted by her red lacy panties.

"Welcome in,roomie!" Emily said, redfaced, stepping aside, and the three women bustled into the house.


	5. Chapter 5

Emily was still in a bit of a sleepy daze, pulling a robe on and following Lana into the kitchen as Jen cheerfully helped Ramona carry suitcases up to her room. Lana pulled some of the groceries interns had stocked the fridge with out and started assembling a salad.

"So they put you two in the same house?" Lana sparkled knowingly, putting kale into a salad spinner.

"Yup." Emily smiled. "Thanks for starting some food…my usual approach is putting a frozen pizza in the oven."

Lana rolled her eyes. "Ah, the life of a writer. I don't think I'd fit into my fairy tale land costumes if I ate a carb this week."

"Speaking of carbs…" Emily shot passed her and plucked a chilled bottle of white wine out of the fridge. Lana looked at it regretfully.

"Forbidden fruit." Lana sighed. "And I don't just mean alcohol, I mean anything that involves fruit because seriously, I cannot swell even a little bit if I'm going to get that purple dress back on."

"I, on the other hand, would absolutely love a glass of forbidden fruit, Ms. Sworn." Ramona said crisply, pulling off her gloves as she approached the kitchen island, looking around the large Victorian rental's updated kitchen with a mix of begrudging approval. "Someone hear knows how to hire a cleaning lady. Hopefully we can get her on a weekly engagement."

Emily rolled her eyes dramatically but poured a glass for Ramona alongside her own. Jen also waved off the beverage.

"Those jeggings…they're about as forgiving as Lana's corsets."

"You can thank Emily here for those as well, the first time I met her she was wearing jeggings so tight you could read the date of a dime in her back pocket." Ramona said, sipping her wine delicately. "Although I guess I should have been grateful for any formality of attire on 's part, given the way she met us at the door. We get it, Ms. Sworn. You have a high, tight ass."

Lana let out a shocked yelp of laughter. Emily's eyebrows shot up.

"This from a woman who wears garter belts on a daily basis?"

Ramona lifted one eyebrow. "Someone's been paying attention."

Emily set down her glass and crossed her arms. "You'd be surprised at what I've figured out about you, Ramona."

"Oh?" Ramona was staring at her with such intensity the room fell silent. "Try me."

"Oh wow, look at the time!" Lana darted a look at her watch. "Jen, we should probably take off soon, our call time for tomorrow is like five am."

"I am not looking forward to handling that chainsaw." Jen laughed. "Okay. Goodnight ladies! Welcome to Storybrooke."

"Indeed. Thank you for meeting us."

"We want to hang out with you guys all the time! We're just down the street and you're such huge inspirations to the characters. Just don't let us intrude on your privacy."

"Privacy? Around Captain Underpants over here?" Ramona grimaced.

The two actresses gave them both hugs and saw themselves out. Emily felt a moment's pause looking across the kitchen counter at her new roommate.

"Thank you for letting me have the master bedroom, by the way." Ramona said, breaking the tense silence. "You got here first, if I had I might have taken the larger room."

Emily bobbled her head a little. "Well…to be honest, the smaller room had a shower instead of a bathtub and I really can't do baths, so…"

"You _can't do baths_?" Ramona looked at her as though she was insane. "I practically live in mine at home. Its where I do my best brainstorming."

The thought of Ramona thinking of one of their scenes, naked, in a bathtub, made Emily feel suddenly sort of dizzy. She gulped.

"Speaking of which, we have a draft due tomorrow morning we haven't finished." Ramona groaned.

"Forgive me, I'm still a little jet lagged-" and you really threw me off making me picture you naked- "Where did we leave off on the last episode?"

"Henry down the mine."

"Ah yes." Emily smiled. "So Emma and Regina start fighting at the top of the mine…they both blame each other for Henry running away."

"Yes. Another epic bitchy throwdown." Ramona sighed, sitting heavily in a chair. "Feeling particularly bitchy right now? Want to get the fight scene out of the way?"

"Not really." Emily leaned on the counter. "Having someone compliment my ass a bunch usually puts me in a good mood, weirdly enough."

Ramona lifted an eyebrow. It really was uncanny how perfectly Lana captured this gesture when she acted as Regina. It probably helped that they looked so crazily alike.

"Does that mean I can take a bath and THEN we can get to work?"

"Sure." Emily shrugged, dropping her hand off the counter. Wouldn't want Ramona to notice that her fingers were shaking.

"Oh, one more thing…" Ramona looked suddenly a little embarrassed. "I have a favor to ask you. If you say yes it would really help me."

"So THAT'S why you were flattering my ass." Emily laughed, a little too much. "Whats up? Shoot."

"I was wondering if it would be alright if my daughter could come visit next week during her spring break."

"Your daughter?!" Emily's jaw almost dropped. "Wow, I had no idea you had a kid. Um, yes, absolutely, of course, she's your daughter. Spring break?"

"She's in college, at Brown." Ramona looked very proud for a moment, her cheeks delicately pinkening.

"In college?" Emily was reeling . How old was Ramona when she had her daughter if she was in college? She couldn't be much older than thirty, surely. "Are you- is her dad going to come visit too?"

"I'm not in touch with her father, and neither is she." Ramona's voice was stiff- like a locked arm, keeping Emily at a distance. "Thanks for saying yes, Emily, I appreciate it."

Ramona smelled sweet fresh out of the shower. Her face, without make up, looked even lovelier bare. In her white terry robe towel, with little matching slippers, she sat tapping her way through her ipad, reading over Emily's version of the mine scene as Emily sat, still in her own robe and underpants, half empty glass of wine in hand. She'd finished the bottle while listening to Ramona's tub fill up, and started on a new one, and now her eyes were softly blurring as she stared Ramona, reading her face as Ramona read her scene. Ramona's brow furrowed- never a good sign, Emily had learned.

"Maybe we're going about this wrong, Emily. Maybe they don't fight in this scene." Ramona set the ipad down on her lap. "I think Regina would be too worried about Henry to bother fighting with his birth mom."

"Well, maybe they come together for this episode." Emily let out a rueful chuckle. "I really don't even know what that would look like."

"We could try role playing?" Ramona stood. "We're just outside the mine. Henry is trapped below us. You've just found the opening, now, in your script I'm supposed to insist that I go down instead because its my son and Emma is a 'troublesome tomboy who keeps butting in'?"

"Or whatever you'd rather have her say." Emily stood, falling into the role of Emma.

"I think she would say help me." Ramona said simply. She took a step closer to Emily. "I think she would say please, just bring him back to me."

Ramona was so close Emily could smell her hair perfectly. She could feel the softness of her breath. As her eyes flickered downwards she saw the delicate olive tip of the robe pointing deep between Ramona's breasts, she was naked underneath the robe. It made her heart leap.

"You know that you can tell me anything, right Ramona?" Emily said at last, her head swimming, forgetting the scene. "I know we sort of- give each other grief but…I want you to know you can talk to me."

Ramona glared a little. "That's not what Emma would do. What would Emma do if Regina came up to her like this?" Ramona took another step forward, gazing insistently into Emily's eyes.

"Help me." Ramona said again, looking at her deeply.

"Any way I can." Emily breathed simply, and put her hands around Ramona's waist. Ramona let out a little gasp.

"Ms. Sworn!" her lip trembled.

Emily covered Ramona's mouth with hers and felt the woman's body tremble in her arms.


End file.
